I am a big fan of science fiction. Because I don’t think it’s entirely fiction. It’s a window into a likely future we may very well be able to create. I love the Star Wars because I believe that one day a lot of it will come to pass, not in “a galaxy far, far away” but in our own Milky Way. People will travel across star systems, and in fact, the definition of “people” itself will change. I love Star Trek, and surely a life form such as the Vulcans must exist out there. To think that we’re the only ones, or what we know today is the limit of what can be known is ignorance, no, it’s arrogance. I wouldn’t even wager that we’re the smartest people in this vast universe. What’s to say that we’re not simply the science experiment of some other higher form of life? What is life for that matter? We only know one kind – the organic form. Who knows what other kinds of life can or do exist? I can go on endlessly because I have a curious mind that’s open to infinite possibilities. But I think I’ve said enough to justify my opening statement – I love science “fiction”.

Universe isn’t the only thing that intrigues me. I find the human mind just as fascinating. There was a time when medicine wasn’t a generally accepted profession. Studying cadavers was considered sacrilegious. But look at how far we’ve come today. Psychologists were once dismissed as shrinks but in recent times more and more people are turning to therapy because now we don’t feel ashamed in admitting that mental health is a crucial aspect of our well being. In fact, a healthy mind is the foundation for a healthy body. Our conscious and subconscious brain only form a fraction of what our mind really is. I believe that there is a lot more that is as yet unconscious. There are aspects of our psyche that we haven’t even discovered. Maybe as psychology becomes more mainstream, we will start to tap into this unconscious part.

Interstellar is another movie I loved. I also have special memory of the time I watched it, but that’s beside the point. There was one thing in particular in that movie that, in hindsight, makes sense to me now, because when I watched the movie I didn’t quite appreciate it. I think it’s mostly because of how it was dealt with. When Amelia and Cooper had to pick one planet that they could visit with the little remaining fuel, Amelia wanted to visit the planet where her beloved was. Cooper wanted to visit the planet that made more sense logically. Amelia’s argument about love being a real force was conveyed so weakly, and in a way that made it seem more like a silly rhetoric founded not in anything scientific but in a schoolgirl-like crush. But that was the whole idea, I reckon. Her capability to make a wise decision stood challenged by the time this exchange came about in the movie. So it was intended for her to lose this argument, or the movie would have ended differently!

I want to revisit what Amelia said but in a more objective way. By now it’s fairly obvious that I also have an unusual fascination with the concept of love. That’s because I think that love is one of the most fundamental human emotions but also the most trivialized one because of the plethora of movies that only focus on one aspect of it. It is so important yet so misunderstood. Through the many conversations I’ve had on the subject, I have come to conclude that there are three kinds of love – romantic, platonic and spiritual love. It’s really the last kind that fascinates me.

Romantic love is the most overrated and overused kind of love, honestly. That’s not to say that it’s not important. It is but it has really skewed our perception of love causing most people to dismiss it as being fleeting, hence trivial. Romantic love pertains to the conscious part of the brain. There’s enough research out there to explain the science behind it. We meet someone we are attracted to, our brain triggers release of happy chemicals like endorphins and dopamine, and we fall in love. Over time the release of these chemicals in response to the same stimulus tapers and we find romantic love fading. So yes, this kind of love is fleeting by design.

Platonic love is the most abundant kind of love that pertains to the subconscious mind. This love satisfies some of our basic human needs. We love our family, friends, certain activities and things. This, in turn, satisfies our desire to belong, to feel accepted and appreciated, to feel joy. Romantic love can often lead to platonic love, like in long term relationships.

Spiritual love, the kind that interests me, is associated with the unconscious part of the mind. Most of us go through life without any spiritual awareness. Sometimes we feel instantly connected to certain people but we don’t make much of it. Spirituality is something that needs to be cultivated, the unconscious needs to be made conscious. It requires time and patience, things that aren’t commonplace in today’s fast-paced life. I always advise people to make time for meditation, even if for just 5 minutes, because it truly can make a world of a difference. I meditate regularly and have felt my spiritual awareness increase over the years as my practice has matured. I recognize spiritual connections when I come across them. These are the people I can engage in meaningful conversations with. They help my spirit grow.

I have one such friend who is almost like my spiritual guru. He routinely gives me valuable feedback about furthering my meditation practice. He even told me recently that I might be close to enlightenment. Honestly, I don’t know what enlightenment is. My practice doesn’t have an end goal so I’m not seeking enlightenment, or anything else. But I do think more deeply now than I did in the past, and it is rarely emotionally charged.

So circling back to where all this started, I think the love that Amelia was talking about was the spiritual kind. She felt a connection with the person she loved and she knew that his data was more reliable. Spoiler alert: she was right as we find out in the end. Just because what she felt could not be explained by science, it was deemed illogical. So logic, then, becomes a subjective and relative term. As our collective knowledge expands, the bounds of logic will also expand. On an individual level, as one’s awareness expands, logic expands.

I am sure there is science behind spiritual love that we aren’t in a position to explain yet. But there are bonds that transcend the physical plane and exist as a certain force field. This is the force that we sometimes feel instantly, and physical distance has no impact on it. It is the feeling of “just knowing“. Once we become aware of this force we can feel it more and more because it is all around us. That is also the reason why I feel that the universe communicates with us. Maybe the universe is made up of matter and anti-matter, and also this force called love. We just need to raise our awareness to a level where we can understand it.

It is rare to find someone with whom we can share all kinds of love. I think I found that last year in my nameless relationship. It started as a spiritual connection, it was instant. Then romantic love followed and it was passionate. And finally we found platonic love too, and it was comfortable. In the end, we had it all, and then we, I, lost it all. So maybe I’m hanging too much on this relationship. I refuse to accept that my one true love is lost forever. So it must still be out there, waiting for me. But moving on, the reason I started writing this post is not to explore my love life but to answer a question I came across after my last post – what is love? So here it is. This is love to me. And when I said that love is all-consuming, I meant that rare kind of love that combines all aspects, because most love we encounter in our lifetime only has two of these three elements at most.

I may be wrong but that’s how the process of learning works. Sometimes you’re right, other times you’re wrong and then you seek what’s right.